1 day until NaBloPoMo begins

Is one the loneliest number? I think we are sometimes conditioned to think it is. After all our bodies mock us with their two-ness, we have two eyes, a pair of hands, a couple of feet,two breasts, two ovaries, two testicles, two ears, you get the idea.
So to say One is the loneliest number, well frankly, I don't buy it.I think it's a misunderstood number, like it's great to be number one, but it's not great to be the only one?
There are a quite a few things you can only do as one, watch that guilty pleasure movie, that you fully enjoy, with out having to feel bad at all that the other person isn't as in to "the Parent Trap" as you are, and I'm talking the version with Haley Mills, not the remake, with Lindsay Lohan, which was okay, but pales in comparison to Mills version .Yeah, I'm that old.
Eating that left over Chinese food for lunch,or sometimes breakfast, depending if I've worked the night before,and eat it cold!That's definitely an only me activity.
Sleeping blissfully in the middle of the bed, with your favorite reads, strewn about you like some protective wall, can only be done as one, unless your partner is really, Really, REALLY skinny, and likes to sleep on the very edge of the bed, so you can be the ultimate ruler of slumberland.
Blogging is a solitary activity,though you may have readers, it still you in your oneness,
writing it, proofing it and hoping the spell check will recognize the word you were trying to type.
It's you that will succeed, or crash and burn at trying to get your thoughts across.It's also you that makes the final decision on whether to post it or not.
So become one,with your one- ness, and get writing!

the great pumpkin....4 days until NaBloPoMo starts.

So Halloween is around the corner, A favorite holiday, all that cool candy, and dressing up in costume, what couldn't be better.
I think carving is another great thing about it, though I enjoy the pumpkins that are complex carvings, that show shadow and light, I am just as enamored with the jack-o-lanterns that are simple faces.
There is something creative, and energizing about carving, and creating a cool scary face, plus it's such a simple way to decorate, before I had an house, I lived in an apartment, i still carved a pumpkin, but i had no where to really put it, for people to see, which is part of the reason you carve,or maybe I should clarify it by saying it's why I carve.
Sometimes I make roasted pumpkin seeds, I used to have this great recipe from Martha Stewart, but I have since lost it.Regardless of what you think of her, she roasts a tasty pumpkin seed.
So here's to easy carving, and a dry Halloween, so all those kiddies can trick-or-treat safely, and dryly.
If you are a flickr-er (could there be such a word?) and you carve a mean pumpkin, or you take pictures of them, feel free to post your creation to the jack-o-lantern group there.

5 days until....NaBloPoMo begins

I think I'm getting a little NaBloPoMo anxiety, wondering if i can do it, hoping I don't fail, and I haven't even started.I think i have the dogged determination to do it, but I also think I will be wanting to write something clever every day, and end up writing my grocery list some days, so at least I can say i wrote.
I was a member of 365 days at flickr, it was a challenge, a self portrait everyday, for 365 days, that taught me a thing or two about myself, that i can commit to something and do it.
Though that was taking photos, and this will be writing, I take a deep breath an aim toward success.
Hopefully.

Snow White upon realizing, she's not over that whole apple thing.

So we all know the story of Snow White, she had a contract taken out on her by her jealous stepmother , who had youth issues evidently. She moves in with a group of dwarves, becomes their girl friday,then finally she's was poisoned by her wicked stepmother, a woman who can't take no for an answer.Then she marries the first guy that saves her from death.
After all the dust settles from that, and they've been married for a many years, does she look back on her life and wonder, "what the hell was i thinking?"
Does she entertain thoughts of eating another apple to see who'll save her this time.
Does she suffer from PTSD, unable to be near apples,very leery of their innocent packaging , but the not so innocent results.
Does this mean fall is her least favorite month, no apple dumpling with ice cream, no slice of apple pie at Thanksgiving?
Or did she get the hell over all that, and run her own successful catering company, after all she was used to cooking for eight people at any one time. So she uses those skills, to make a name for her self in the catering world, with the ever popular catch phrase "Snow White's Catering, our apple pie is so good, it'll kill you."
Who really knows, but I'd like to think she became a success, and even when she comes upon an apple, and it gives her moment to pause, remember, then move on.

NaBloPoMo|9 days until

this picture doesn't really have much to do with that. I have been keeping my eye on the arrival of November, after all it's the month that NaBloPoMo starts, or if you didn't know that means National Blog Posting Month, which is the first cousin to NaNoWriMo, where your writing daily pages to a novel, that's way beyond, what I can give for time, and this I might possibly succeed at, I hope.

lust

lust, originally uploaded by ms.Tea.

if this isn't the color of lust, i don't know what is.

grow baby grow

, originally uploaded by ms.Tea.

death

, originally uploaded by ms.Tea.

over the weekend, 5 teens hung out , they watched the Red Sox beat the Yankees , went out after,had ice cream,to celebrate the victory, and on the way home , a single car accident occurred. 4 of them died that night out, and only one will return home.
2 of the girls were from our town, they were best friends.
Julianne was 18 years old, I went to high school with her Mom and Dad.We
were teenagers together once . Then we became adults, our children were born on the same year.My son is also18 years old, and it stops my breath to try to begin to understand, how awful and numbing, and lost and sad she must be feeling.I can't even begin to comprehend , how you deal with the death of your child. My heart goes out to them.

Tommorrow is the wake, then Thursday the funeral.

this isn't supposed to happen,
to anyone.

lyman conservatory

this bulb show convinced me, i need to plant tulips this fall.

iPod nation

I should have posted this around Valentine's Day, but I was too busy eating chocolate.
For my family, Valentine's day is very much a "who's bringing home the chocolate" kind of holiday...we're not big into gifts, just chocolate.So this year i bought my portion of the chocolate, and I figured we were set.
It's the usual routine when I work nights, I sleep during the day, get up about the time Tom is getting home, but it's the winter,and he's on call for the heating company he works at,on a service call, so I'm up and surfing the net...specifically I'm looking at , or uploading pictures on Flickr. :)
I hear him come in, say hello from the other room, then i hear him and Zack talking, I'm not really paying attention to them.

Zack:"Mom, come and see these chocolates"

Me:"yeah, I'll be there in a few"

Zack:"no really you have to come see this"

Okay, so now I'm up, I come into the kitchen to see them standing there, with sheepish little grins, and on the butcher block is this heart shaped box of chocolates, except the cellophane is off, and well I'm think there something that will jump out at me when I open it.
so reluctantly I lift the lid, inside the box is empty of chocolate, but full of a new Ipod!!!!!!!!
My first reaction is the ever eloquent "shut -up!"
I pick up the box with the smiling pirate Johnny Depp on the cover,
"you guys, oh my gawd" opening the packaging...it's a black Ipod, wooo hoooo!!!
"I had no idea, this was a total surprise."
Needless to say i had two really proud guys happy that they pulled off the ultimate V-Day surprise...i wonder what will happen next year.

Amsterdam part2

this is a continuation, of my adventures in Amsterdam, that i started writing in October.
yes my middle name is procrastinator.



donderdag,May 11th
I'm liking it here, as the days pass. We are now alert to the fact that those wide cobblestone pathways are for bikes, and just as we wouldn't be walking down the center of the street, we also do the same for the bike paths, and use the sidewalks.today was pretty seamless, and the weather is perfect, nice and warm. So we walk around everywhere and eat .
A visit to the Rembrandthuis,(Rembrandt's house) which I find very interesting with my printmaking background,the printing press, the tarlatan and his etching are wonderful crisp focused lines, which contrast his dark velvety drypoints.
The only strangeness is the fellow American we run into who, as she's standing at the front step, asks us nervously if we know where the Rembrandt house is. Her friend gives her a double take , as I believe they just found it, and knew where they were, but her friend is acting like she's in the depth of the wilds instead, the easily maneuvered city of Amsterdam.
We quietly tell her yes she's here, and leave promptly, to head off to The Green House, and try the skunk, which the host tells us is mild and sweet, and perfect for a day at the museum, which is true.
I'm noticing after one day on the house boat , when i stand still everything, gently rocks back and forth, like I'm still on it, some of my friends, aren't keen on that feeling but I really like it.(perhaps the skunk, has helped me form this opinion)
We journey on, to decide between Rijksmuseum, or the VanGogh museum, we decide on the Van Gogh museum, and we buy a two day pass there, so we can see the Van Gogh's one day ,and return to see the Rembrandt and Caravaggio exhibit, the other.
As we walk through the museumplein, it is very warm and sunny,we notice all the locals sitting and soaking their feet in the oval pond/ice rink that is there...ahhhhh the water is a little on the cold side, but feels so wonderful after walking everywhere, and with the increasingly warm day, we stop have an ice cream, soak up some sun, before we head to the Van Gogh museum refreshed and ready to see his wonderful paintings.The range from his earlier darker paintings to the beautiful full of light painting he did at Arles, the almond blossom is by far one of my favorites. after viewing them, we return to the warm afternoon, and the different sales booths, in the museumplein, I find a shirt for Zack, and have a frosty cold drinks, and take the opportunity to soak my feet again.
we are off again to wander the streets, we come up on another lovely coffee house the Bombay Chai House, I recommend it for more than it's selection, the owner Tika, is so generous, and sweet, and make the most delicious chai,foamy and sweet and laced with warm honey.I also use a vaporizer, which removes , any little cough, you could ever have, from your green selection. with a vaporizer there is no smoke, no cough, just a wonderful grin.


one of things I enjoy with my travel mates, is we all enjoy the explore aspect of Amsterdam, we find a small market, that has better produce, then even Whole Foods, and is run by one family, who knows his neighbor by name. I witness him giving a young man from the neighborhood, and bag of 2nd day fruit, which benefits him in two ways, he doesn't have to throw it a way, and his neighbor get some great produce for mere euros. We score some lovely strawberries, figs, apricots,juicy cherries there.
we also happen upon Dirk Van de Broek grocery chain, there we stock up on jenever, yogurt, milk and beauty items. I am impressed with how it's common place to bring your own bags,I notice this after I wonder about the line of tables set up, I figure there for people to eat at, if they are hungry, where really it's for you to pack your groceries in said recycled bags, and head on your way.
From we head back to the house boat, as we pass buy our local shops in our neighborhood, we stop in the deli and the cheese shop , and pick up the rest of our things for our houseboat nosh,
which consists of white asparagus , chicory salad, grated celeriac salad with capers , snow peas with hariticot verts, potato salad, we also have some wonderful crusty bread from the cheese shop,some sweet pecan bars, and spiced carrot cake, all reasonably priced, and soo delicious.The rest of the afternoon is spent planning our next day, we're off to Keukenhof to see all the flowers. that night we go to dinner at Solenda Kalapa, which is just down the street on Utrechtsestraat, we have the rice table, which is delicious the food is fresh, the meat tender, the veggies cooked perfectly, all of it satisfying.
Two charming girls greet us and serve us, they were new but happy and not afraid to show there inexperience, they didn't get stressed , just continued to smile. the best part of the meal is we could just walk down the street and return home. it still make me pleased, this is our neighborhood, we live here (temporarily).

day 167 eyedrops

day 167 eyedrops, originally uploaded by ms.Tea.

where do I begin, with describing my freak accident, in shopping.
I was loading my groceries into the car, i had just finished a shift at work.
i grabbed the bag with the potato chips in it, it was one of those flimsy plastic ones,the bag of chips was big, shiny, sharp cornered.
I hoisted that bag and whap! hit myself in the eye, with the sharp little corner, there was major tearing from this eye,i wiped away some lashes, but my eye still felt like there was dust, dirt, jagged little pieces of glassdust, under my eyelid.

so i look around in that effected eye, and see nothing just watery redness, and then i se it, it's an irregular little island of shine on my cornea, i blink i look again... and f*ck, it's not going away...i have a scratched cornea...!!!!

luckily i was 10 minutes from the Emergency Room, at the hospital i work.I got treated, I'm using my eye drops, which sting like a bastard, and my ointment that smears my vision to this surreal shimmer.

i am healing, i didn't have to take any Vicodin today, which actually are a nice sleepy painfree place to visit, just a few Motrin.

the most important thing this corneal abrasion needs is sleep, and eye rest, so goodnight

a la gehry

I know If I worked at the Conde Nast Building in NYC, I would be in front of this wall constantly, taking pictures of myself.

the heating situation

yeah!!
we have heat again.
now I can pull prints, in a mere t-shirt!
woo hoo!!

Today I printed my Christmas/Holiday cards.
It was inspired by an article I read about Grant Wood.

day70-cold and chilly

day70-cold and chilly
Originally uploaded by ms.Tea.

here I am at Zea Mays.
where i get the privledge of time to explore printmaking.
normally i would be smiling, except there's no heat in the building , it was 59 degrees.
i had 4 layers up top , finished by this lovely sweater i purchased from j crew mens catalog.
it's warm and toasty wool, merino to be specific.

with all those layers, you'd think i'd be warm and toasty, well *the girls* were warm , but my ass froze(only 2 layers)...tomorrow i'm back to print more, but i'll have my long johns on.(damn it)

Amsterdam

I traveled this May,to Amsterdam have been meaning to write it all down on my return. So, I waited awhile.

I lived on a house boat,on the Prinsengracht canal.
It was a lovely neighborhood, from the buildings, to the cobblestone streets and bike paths.(more about those later)
In our neighborhood, there were a few cafe's on the canal, a gourmet deli and a wonderful cheese shop, where the owner, really knows how to treat you, if you love cheese. He very attentive and somewhat handsome, there are buttery paper thin slices of a young Gouda, and then the jagged chunks of the older goudas ...It was heaven. Plus he had a machine that would vacuum pack your cheese, so you could bring it home on the plane, in your luggage. Which was a good plan initially, but when I arrived home, my luggage was searched, because they thought I was carrying a wedge of explosives.
so wither further adieu...My trip.

Woendag, may 10th
we have arrived, in Amsterdam...In a bang!
the trams are too narrow, we packed too much in our luggage, we are sleep deprived, the morning hustle is so fast, and we are moving anything but fast.
I have already planned when I come back( and I will)
I will pack a smaller suitcase, or not and take a taxi, from Schipol.
After all that hustle and then discovering I have no signal on my cell phone (what, what,what!!!)I am worried in the pit of my stomach, that my family will be worried, and we won't have contact, at all...yikes! The hysteria of a sleep deprived mind.
with no cell phone signal,I can't call the manager, of the houseboat, to let us in. And we want to get in!! We are sleep deprived, and all ready sick of dragging our luggage across the cobblestones, and discovering that nice wide path that we think is for walking , is really a bike path, and they have the right of way. at first we don't notice, the far off insistent ring of riders, as they warn us of the imminent arrival, and we need to get out of their way.
I have to now get some coinage, or a phonecard, and frankly what color are they phones? In the U.S they are blue, In the U.K. they are red, in the Netherlands I discover,they are green.
I walk with Mary Jane,and we find a small cigar shop, where we purchase a phone card,walk only a short distance and find a phone. I leave a message for Phil, the house boat manager. I feel a little hopeless, we reach a machine....Will we have to wait long???

By the time we get back to the house boat, Philip arrives 5 minutes, later.
He is charming, and helps us with our luggage. He also is very proud of the houseboat,for he helped refinish the wood work inside. The house boat is a gem, and very worth every penny. It is beautiful rebuilt, with gleaming rich mahogany. Gorgeous stained glass. Every inch of space is used, there are little cubbies and cabinets, in every spare inch. There is a space under our bed for me to store my behemoth of a suitcase. The beds are loft style, and are so comfortable, and big! If this is a double sized bed, America needs to catch up. Over our bed, is a skylight, we like to keep it open at night to stargaze, and I loved waking up in the morning hours with a view of the local rooftops and trees.

Once we settle and get a grip, we are thrilled we have arrived, and off we go to explore our surroundings. There is a stop at our neighborhood coffeshop, called Barney's, and we sample the laughing Buddha, very good, some laughing but reasonable. I am still able to function , and visit to the Bloemenmarkt.

The Bloemenmarkt, is a sight on it's own, masses of flowers, amaryllis bulbs the size, of baby doll heads, it a wonderful gift, and completely enthralls me with this place.
We stop to have a bite to eat, we try the fried bitterballen, and I have a mushroom omelet,the mushrooms and leeks are sauteed, and I taste a hint of tumeric, or perhaps it's curry powder.
Back to the houseboat, to hang out and regroup. There is a lovely common area in the boat, there is a table for four, and two easy chairs, a two large stained glassed windows, open onto the canal. At dusk,the boat cruising begins, we observe boats filled with groups of friends, families, sharing drink, food and laughs,we see an occasional tourist canalboats, where we are no longer the observers, but the observed.
That night when we finally sleep, it feels sooooo good.

just because

in memory of

25 years ago, I was on my senior class trip.
I took this then.
before there was a 9/11.
now it is five years later,
and this old photo, has this sad significance.

we will not forget.

the view

emotions

It's funny how certain things, can bring a tear to your eye, and have you grinning wildly all at the same time.This is one of those things.
Where the hell is Matt?