the bitch is back

some days you just have to bitch.

Today was a good day, though it started out late. I had one of those surreal moments this morning in bed, as I looked at the time, it wasn't registering in my head why my clock read 8:15am, not 7:30. My brain briefly asked "why is the time, wrong on your clock?" Then quickly recognition came to me, " damn, I'm running late, there is nothing wrong with my clock!!"
Uggh thud, out of bed I slow motion moved, to get showered, fed, and off to the studio, my plan to get there earlier wasn't happening today.Why I thought I would somehow wake up with out an alarm,is beyond me.
What else is beyond me , is my inability to commit to exercise. It's annoying to me how I can find reasons not to do it, yet dislike the squishy over 40 belly I have become.
You know what I'm talking about , that belly that showed up one year, in the forty somethings, like some uninvited relative that just won't leave. It just hangs around like a life preserver, for just in case, I drown on the couch!?!
I mean honestly , what is my issue? When I begin regular exercise my body loves it, I get that endorphin buzz, I get more energy, more flexible, less concerned about my less than perfect body, I begin to accept it, because I'm more in tune with it.I actually feel , dare I say empowered.
I unfortunately am really good, at falling off that wagon, over indulging on sweets, becoming more sedentary, more achy. Man, what a whiner I can be about this.
I started the Ass project '08 in august, I was doing well, until I pulled some back muscles, I may want to hang with Mr. Bowflex, but I ended up overdoing it to the point of back spasms...which frankly sucked. It stopped me dead in my tracks, did it stop me from returning to a jiggling goddess? No!
What saved my back muscles, and the soon to be developing hole in my stomach, from all the Motrin I was taking, was yoga.
Yoga, that four lettered word, that frankly I should be wanting to hear, was my lifesaver, it stretched out my very tender muscles, it decreased my pain, and cripes, it even kept my arms firm.Without endless rep of bicep curls or tricep extensions.I made me use my own inflating weight, as the weight I would lift to keep my muscles strong, firm , and flexible.
What a concept! This is the ultimate in no frills exercise equipment, I guess it's true, that all you ever need to succeed is yourself.So this may be the day to vent my flabby little spleen, but it's the first day, of my commitment to daily yoga.
In 39 days will be our Print Fair North, at our studio, I'm using that as a small reasonable goal to aim for, daily yoga for the next 39 days, if it doesn't change my body, in strength, and flexibility, then I can stop. Become a couch potato, grow that third chin to accent the developing second chin, I've been growing, and wallow in self pity (waaah!)

But I believe, I will discover, the exact opposite.(fingers crossed)(see, more exercise)

pain in the ...

I want to write ass project '08, because that would be so cute. But really it's my back...it started on Sunday, it was beautiful sunny, there was a breeze was blowing, my husband was going sailing, I wanted to join him, but my back had other ideas, the spasmy painful kind.

How did the back pain occur, I'm thinking Mr. Bowflex, might of had something to do with it, but I'm denying that for now, even though I know I'm probably right.

I find at 45 years of age,I do something physical, that my body protests about, it's 2 or 3 days later, I get the soreness, well this time I got the pain....grrrr.

So I spent Sunday icing my back , and taking Motrin every 6 hours, I can be such a good patient/nurse when I want to be. It helped, and then later that night a hot shower, and my arnica shower gel helped too, along with more Motrin. I was able to go to work, and I thought I was on the mend until my 5am rounds, at work, and my bra began to feel like a vice grip , as it was trying to become one with my back. So I took more Motrin, and I tried not to breathe too deep. As much as I wanted to rip my bra off, I can't really let the girls fly at work. Though the pharmacy tech, that always looks at me at boob level, might have liked that.

Thankfully I could drive home with my bra unhooked, and by the time I reached home, my Motrin was working, and the ice packs were ready. I went to bed feeling less pain.
Well I maybe went to bed like that but 6 hours later my back muscles had had enough, and wanted out of the bed, no more sleeping, and the spasmy pain was back full force.

Needless to say, I wasn't handling it very well, I was weepy, and pissed at myself for being a baby, I was worried I might have to call out sick, and then my tired mind, started saying "what if it never goes away, then what will you do then?!?!"
Luckily my body ignored my mind, and the Motrin began to work, so I got on my hands and knees, and did cat stretches which started to help, in a way that made me glad I'm still able to remember yoga stretches .

By Tuesday my back was in much less pain, and no more spasmy muscle feelings, though I still stopped myself before I sneezed , or coughed, that was more fear based, because over the weekend it hurt alot to do those very thing, I even went with out Motrin, but I didn't go with out doing my cat stretches, which evidently amused the dog, because she gets playful every time, I'm kneeling doing them.

I also was really good about resting my back, no heavy lifting, and I took a week off from Mr. Bowflex, and I walked a few days instead.
Next week I'm planning on going back to Mr. Bowflex, but I will decrease the weight by 5 or 10 lbs. And I'll stretch before and after, something I've been being stupid about.

I'll also get right on treating this pain, if it comes back, instead of thinking it'll just go away.

'08 AP-week four

My commitment to this project grows, as my ass is hopefully shrinking.
I think I may have seen some results this week, no wait let me rephrase that I did see some results.

The other day as I got dressed , I put on my favorite turquoise colored t-shirt and my most comfy pair of denim shorts. It wasn't until I walked by the mirror, that I caught a glimpse of my shrinking belly roll . My body was more gravity defying. No, wait that's too strong a word, it was less jiggly. there was less jiggling going on.When I flexed my arm, I had a firmer muscle under there, a bicep and triceps, for cripes sake.

My brain has an Oprah moment, right then and realized simply that, exercise is good for my body!!! That exercise, that's right I'm using the E word again,helps build muscle tone.
I am shocked and pleased at how frickin' simple this whole concept is, and why I let it allude me. I'm actually using moderation when eating. Moderation, not dieting. I eat two oreos instead of 6. I'm eating more fruit and veg. I'm still having my ice cream. And stop the presses!! I'm drinking more water, even.

I look forward to my visits to Mr. Bowflex,I no longer mock them,I'm getting more flexible, and strong doing a a few sets of yoga. Who knew endorphins could feel so good.So so so good.

I'm four weeks in, and I feel great. Yay! me.

the wednesday project

As I don't want a lot of unwanted ass attention, I decided to post my proclamation on Thursday, beside the fact I just read the post over at Mrs.G's, today.
But from here out I'll be posting on Wednesdays, about the disappearance of my double twin, I mean my chin.
Over at Derfward Manor, a gauntlet was thrown, okay not really thrown, but it makes for some dramatic blog entry, if I say that.

It's all about the '08 Ass Project. A motivational tool to get off mine and get moving, A suggestion is to use the couch to 5k running plan. But I know myself, and sometimes repetition gives me a reason to rationalize to stop. So I'll be doing a mixture of that, and walking, and swimming, or something.

Other committed people(bloggers) will posts pictures of their body parts, as they firm up and get into better shape. Because I like to do things a little different I will post a little video , as I'm in the midst of a video Self Portrait over at Ipernity called 365 minutes.

So this the part where I roll the video, of my rolls.